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Behind the Scenes

The Making of a Fez Night

Here at last, for all those crappy spring bank holiday Mondays when you're stuck in the house on a shitty day in someplace like Girvan, Renfrew, Greenock, East Kilbride, Kalmar... (you get the picture) and there's bugger all on the box.

The first stage of the Fez Night is to ask the great god of Fez, Ladillas del Pendejos (right), for permission. If he remains silent and we are given no sign (such as a plague of locusts, for example), then the Fez Night commences on the appointed date. The same process is implemented to ensure that He agrees with the choice of Fez Meister.

With these decided, we then select a venue for the Fez Night. This is usually done according to where most Fezzers can make, although the Fez Meister does have the last word in this.

Having done the above preparations, the Fezzers then meet at the appointed time and place and proceed to get totally pissed out of their faces. Once a reasonable state of drunkeness has been attained it is usually time for the Fez Meister to be officially appointed by the Previous Meister. The Fezzers then proceed to get paralytic. So if you have the occasional taste for alcohol and don't mind indulging in a little buffoonery, you're more than welcome. Click here for details.

The Fez Meister, usually accompanied by a Miss Fez, has the Medal of Fez presented by the Previous Fez Meister

A behind the scenes look at a Fezzer being photographed for inclusion on this web site

But of course it's not all fun and games. There are tears also...

The Mooncat and the Baron console a rejected Miss Fez candidate. All our girls have to have that little something special

Also, when so many superstars are together, there's bound to be conflicts, as seen here.

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